Just because I feel like smacking someone upside the head does not mean that I am supposed to allow myself to do that. I cannot do everything I feel like doing.
God wants us to grow up and realize there are some things in this life that we must learn to control. One of those things is our emotions.
If you and I are to be leaders, we must realize that we will not be able to do or say everything that is on the inside of us.
I remember one time telling my husband, 'Dave, do you know what I feel like doing? I feel like running away from home!"
At that time I felt that everything in my life was caving in on me. There were problems at the office, problems in the home, problems everywhere I looked. I thought, I want to get out of here! But I know I shouldn't do that because I am a leader, and leaders do not run away from things they don't like. They stay and deal with them - because they have stability, aka self-control.
Stability is Important for Leaders
Before we talk about why stability is important, let's define it. Webster's II New College Dictionary defines stability as "1. Resistance to sudden change, dislodgement, or overthrow. 2. a. Constancy of character or purpose: STEADFASTNESS. b. Reliability: dependability."
If you have stability, you do what is right when it feels good AND when it doesn't feel good - you pray when you feel like it and when you don't feel like it. You give despite your feelings - and you give not just what you want to give, but what God is encouraging you to give.
Self-Control: The Key to Stability
I love The Amplified Bible translation of Galatians 5:22, 23 because it reveals things that I might have missed otherwise. It tells me that the Spirit of God on the inside of me is a Spirit of discipline and self- control. But the fruit of the [Holy] Spirit [the work which His presence withing accomplishes] is love, joy (gladness), peace patience (an even temper, forbearance), kindness, goodness (benevolence), faithfulness, gentleness (meekness, humility) self-control (self-restraint, continence)...
God Provides Emotional Stability
According to this scripture, self-control is a fruit of the Holy Spirit. If you want to be a leader, you must be able to control yourself.
Have you ever known someone who is up and down all the time, like you never know what they're going to do next? I call them "high maintenance". They constantly need attention.
People who fit this description follow their emotions rather than following the leadership of the Holy Spirit within them. If they don't learn to follow the Holy Spirit through the inner knowledge He gives and by reading and obeying the word, they will never develop into what God wants them to be.
Leaders have to discipline themselves and stay in control. They have to be able to recognize when they are going in a wrong direction and make the appropriate corrections themselves without someone else having to do it for them.
That kind of emotional stability, self-control and self-restraint is not limited to leaders; it is something we all need to develop more of in our lives.
Up and Down Like A Yoyo
I remember the years when I was what I call a "Christian yo-yo". I was continually up and down. If Dave did what I liked, I was happy. If he didn't do what I liked, I would get mad.
I have grown since those days. Dave still doesn't always do the things I liked but now it doesn't upset me the way it used to. The reason it doesn't upset me as much now is that I have learned to exercise self-control.
Sometimes, Dave and I discuss what we see ahead for the ministry. We have many goals but as the leaders, neither of us does anything beyond our gifts and calling. That's another key to keeping your emotional stability.
Anyone can acquire stability; it is not limited to those in ministry. In the end, it's imperative not only for a good leader but for every person to develop stability because God wants to do more with your life than you could ever imagine.
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from Enjoying Everyday Life, A Joyce Meyer Ministries (JMM) magazine August 2011 issue
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